Tuesday, February 7, 2012

It's a privilege

Joseph was crying in the night and I got him a bottle and gave it to him. He was drinking it so fast and his head felt hot. after I laid him back down he started coughing and threw up. That happened a few times and luckily it wasn't too messy. Russ came to get him so I could clean myself up took him and brought him into our bed. There he slept for awhile on his daddies chest and as I looked at them I knew in my heart I had made a good choice in who I chose for a husband. 
Later I took him back to his bed cause he was making it clear he wanted to be there by: wringing his hands over and over, waving bye, bye to the ceiling, rolling all over our bed, trying to climb out of the bed, and nodding vigorously when I asked if he wanted to go to his bed. 
He has seemed a little better this morning and hasn't thrown up yet, but I know he is not feeling well because he mostly just wants to cuddle. 
As I sat in the rocking chair with him, wrapped up in an old quilt and reading books my heart swelled about 10 sizes bigger. He put a book down, grabbed the blanket with his pudgy little hand and pulled it up around his chin. The he dozed off as I rubbed his arm and kissed his head.
I used to think it was just the fact that my kids were snuggling with me that made me feel the way I was feeling, but I realized it is because I feel an almost overwhelming sense of gratitude for being able to provide some comfort for him when he is not feeling well. He loves me and feels safe in my arms and that is because I love him and take care of him. I find it the greatest privilege of my life to serve my family and give them love. Nothing in this world makes me feel better.

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