I have never been very good at journaling about being sick with pregnancy. Maybe because I don't want to remember it? This time I took pictures and posted them on instagram. So I journaled it, sort of. I thought I should put it here.
"I am in a bad place today."
"This guy is the best. While I am worthless he has spent his days off getting everything done. Here he is shooting William while they are decorating his cake for scouts."
"I think I have cried more today than I did all last year combine."
(This was the night I was released as Young Womens president)
"His face as I let him lick the candy bar wrapper. He does such a good job of brightening my days and reminding me why I am doing what I am doing."
(We were at the park waiting for his brother and sister in choir. I was so hungry and found half a Butterfinger in my purse. It sounded awful but I ate it and it helped.)
"Eating, reading, and just laying outside. Trying to pretend I don't feel so bad and noticing there is not one.single.cloud. in the sky."
(We were eating cheese crisps, yet again, and reading Charlotte's Web. Which we still haven't finished.)
Me and Margo watching everyone else set up for the party."
(I had been out to my moms for a few days but came home for the weekend of Jessica's shower.)
Jared Allen was busy today. Thanks, it was delicious."
(We had him make his awesome artisan pizza's for the shower. They are seriously so good.)
"Jessica can have her baby now"
You know it's not going well when you have to crack open a ginger ale in the store. Heaven help me make it home."
"Russ goes back to work tomorrow so we headed out to my moms so she can take care of us."
"This makes me emotional. Lot's of things make me emotional right now; like listening to Newsies or Les Mis, seeing my midwife again, and Williams hugs."
"Don't worry, I'll get up in a second. Just need to regain my strength."
(at this point I was throwing up multiple times a day and had no energy.)
"This kid knows what to do when mom is having a really hard day."
(He really was so sweet. He would come and lay by me everyday. But once my throwing up slowed down and I started to feel better he turned into a different kid, a mean one.)
"The good news: my hair looks like this full time. The bad news: my lovely bath ended with me throwing up...again. Oh and I am down 5 lbs."
"Dear Depression, you really try hard and sometimes you win, but sometimes you don't stand a chance. Also I haven't thrown up today!!!"
(He wanted to nap in my bed and it was really sweet.)
"Fill 'er up"
(On a Sunday while my family was enjoying dinner I was headed to the hospital with Russ. On the way there he said, "we are alone, what do you want to talk about" and I burst into tears because I didn't care about anything and had nothing to talk about. The hospital was freezing. They gave me fluids and a new prescription of Reglan. Which helped a lot.
"Well the meds they gave me at the hospital helped a lot. I have only thrown up once and I straightened my hair so I wouldn't look like a treasure troll anymore."
"Gracie got to go to Build a Bear for Presley's birthday party and on the way home she said, "is this a dream?"
"My nightstand. My mom gave me a bell to ring in case I need something so I don't have to yell." And anytime I rang it William came running to see what I needed.
"They brought me flowers."
"Somebody desperately needs his daddy to come home and wrestle him."
"mmmm noodle soup. I know my diet isn't making anyone jealous but I didn't throw up yesterday so that is nice."
"Homeboy won three of his races in the pinewood derby yesterday. I may have cried because I missed it."
"Gracie decided to give Joe a haircut right before Easter!"
"counting black bees out the window."
"Now this one has joined us and he hasn't even said, "I hate you mom" today yet."
It is hard having a mom who lays down all the time. He was getting tired of it.
And now we are to Easter, which I already posted about. Man I am just cruising along with this catch up business:)